Why do I hate myself when I make a mistake? How do I change that?

Why do I hate myself when I make a mistake?

It is very possible that you hate yourself when you make a mistake because of your past negative programming from childhood.

Something you learned or experienced in your past made an impression on your subconscious. Subconsciously, you believe that making mistakes makes you a bad person or means that you are a failure. You are not alone. Many people feel the same.

People with a healthier perspective, understand that mistakes are part of the learning process.

We all have lessons to learn and while others see mistakes as something to avoid at all costs, the truth is mistakes are a part of life.

Its about your mindset and perspective. You control that and you can change it.

When you do, you will no longer hate yourself when you make a mistake.

Can making mistakes be good?

Why do I hate myself when I make a mistake? Article Continued...

If you are self-aware and open to personal development, you can learn a life lesson that will help you achieve personal satisfaction and improve your overall well-being. Even if that lesson is, I Will Never Do That Again.

Forgive yourself and move on.

Earlier, I mentioned, you should learn from mistakes and not repeat them. That's not the case for everyone. Sometimes we find ourselves repeating the same mistakes again and again.

The first time I heard a motivational speaker say, "Mistakes are a good thing." I was like, whatever dude. After listening to the reasons why, I realized I needed to change my perspective.

Nobody likes to make mistakes. Certainly not me- a procrastinating perfectionist. And if you're reading this, you probably don't like to either.

James Joyce said, "Mistakes are portals of discovery."

Why are you repeating the same mistakes?

If you are repeating the same mistakes, it's not okay. I won't sugar coat it. You're stuck in a bad pattern. Whatever bad habit or mistake that keep repeating is toxic and has control of you.

You are no longer in control, if you keep doing something knowing that it is only causing you pain. "Doing the same thing and expecting different results" is insanity. Doing the same thing knowing that you are going to get the same unhealthy result, is self-harm and self-sabotaging.

Why are you repeating the same mistakes? You need to seek help. The mistake continues because you haven't learned the lesson and you are repeating the cycle.

Why do I hate myself when I make a mistake: Making mistakes over and over again.

Here are 10 reasons you may be stuck in a cycle of making the same mistake:
  1. You are not self-aware.
  2. Your social circle is toxic and enabling you.
  3. You are getting some benefit from repeating the mistake over and over again.
  4. You may have subconscious programming that is keeping you stuck.
  5. You haven't made the decision to make a different choice.

8. Maybe you haven't changed because the negative consequences have been minimal to null.

9. Perhaps the situation calls for accountability and you would benefit from having a close ally to help keep you honest.

10. Lastly, perhaps you developed a behavior pattern as a child and you are simply acting it out automatically.

Don't beat yourself up. Forgive yourself and commit to developing a healthier behavior pattern.

"Encourage yourself, believe in yourself, and love yourself. Never doubt who you are."

– Stephanie Lahart

Why do I hate myself when I make a mistake?Article Continued...

7 Tips to Help You Avoid Repeating the Same Mistakes

Most of us live lives riddled with the same mistakes relived time and time again. This is incredibly common, but life doesn't have to be this way. We have the ability to learn from our past. We can make wiser decisions and behave differently in the future. Those that can do this successfully find life to be much easier than those that can't.

Imagine a life where you only make a particular mistake once. How much easier and more successful would your life be? Many of the mistakes we repeat severely limit our progress.

Eliminating repeated mistakes can be more powerful than learning new information or developing new skills. Consider these ideas to make the most of your mistakes and never repeat them again:

  • Identify your mistakes. You can’t avoid what you don’t identify. Look back over the last few days and think about the mistakes you’ve made. Do the same with the past year, and then your entire life.

Write out all the significant mistakes you’ve made.Repeat this process each evening for the day you just lived.

  • Notice patterns of behavior. It’s generally not the mistakes you only make once that disrupt your life the most. It’s the mistakes you make over and over.

What are the mistakes you seem to make time and time again? These are the mistakes that deserve your focus.

Article, 2021-Why do I hate myself when I make a mistake?

Fixing these mistakes will have a great impact on your life.

  • Have a plan. It's not enough to identify your mistakes. It's important to have a plan going forward into the future. What will you do when the same situation arises in the future? How will you avoid making the same mistake again?
  • Identify how you want to handle things going forward. Without a plan, you're doomed to repeat your mistakes.
  • Harness the power of habits. If you're regularly making the same mistakes, this is a perfect circumstance for developing a new habit.

The best way to replace a negative habit is to overcome resistance to personal change and create a new, positive habit.

Why do I hate myself when I make a mistake? Article Continued...

Suppose you're consistently late for work. A beneficial habit to develop might be to wake up 30 minutes earlier.

If you drink too much soda, a good habit to create might be to carry water with you everywhere you go. Identify new, more beneficial habits that will ensure you don’t repeat your mistakes.

Understand the negative impact of the mistake. Ensure that you understand the full impact your mistakes are having on your life. You'll be more motivated to avoid repeating them if you have a complete understanding of how they negatively impact your life.

Pain is a motivator- a very significant self-motivation for humans. What pain are your mistakes causing you?

Understand the benefit of the new, positive behavior. Fortunately, humans are also motivated by pleasure. Identify the benefits you will receive by changing your behavior. It's not enough to casually recognize the benefits.

It's imperative to visualize the benefits and create an emotional charge.

  • Monitor. Notice when you've made a new mistake, repeated an old mistake, or avoided an old mistake. Checking yourself regularly is the best way to continue making progress.

No one likes to make mistakes-hence constantly asking yourself why do I hate myself when I make a mistake?-- but it's simply a part of life. However, just because mistakes are common doesn't mean we have to continue making the same mistakes over and over again.

Ensuring that you make a mistake only once is a great way to enjoy your life more and to experience more success. Vow to yourself that you're only going to make a particular mistake once.Once is enough!

Thank you for reading. "Why do I hate myself when I make a mistake?" Read more articles to help you increase your self confidence and build self esteem.

About the Artwork Featured in the Headings on this Site: If you like the awesome artwork that you see on these pages, check out these Artists' Etsy shops:


  • National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 (SAFE)
  • National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255


 Join Subscriber List. Get A Free E-book