Asking yourself is my relationship toxic? Check out these red flags...
If you're asking, "Is my relationship toxic", you may be. The very idea that you are concerns means that your Spidey sense has tingled around this person and something seems off.
Not saying they are a villain, but if the shoe fits....At the very least, something about their behavior has you questioning whether or not they could be prone to toxic behavior and thereby going to cause you heartache and headache down the road.
Many toxic relationships could be avoided at the dating stage, as long as you are aware of the differences between red flags and green flags!
Red Flag A: This person treats the waitress / waiter rudely.
When you are sitting in a restaurant with the person you are dating, observe how they treat the waitress / waiter.
Does this person show any appreciation?
When the food / wine / service goes wrong, how does your date treat the waitress / waiter?
If this person treats the waitress / waiter in a rude way, it’s a huge red flag because when you two are still dating, your date is still on their best behavior.
However, in the long term when you are in a real relationship with this person, this will become a toxic relationship as this person’s real behavior displays lack of respect.
Without respect, the relationship isn’t really a partnership.
Green Flag B: When you show your insecurities / vulnerabilities, this person fully supports you.
Red Flag B: When you show your insecurities / vulnerabilities, this person uses your insecurities / vulnerabilities against you / to their advantage.
Indeed, the right person would support you because of your insecurities and vulnerabilities, whereas the toxic person would use your insecurities and vulnerabilities against you in order to ruthlessly & outrageously benefit themselves. Clearly, this type of relationship is highly toxic and very dangerous.
Green Flag C: This person is very honest with you, although the truth is unpleasant and / or embarrassing.
Red Flag C: This person lies about many small things on various occasions.
Honesty indicates authenticity, i.e., the most important trait in an individual.
In contrast, if this person lies about a wide variety of small things, it oftentimes means lying is a habit – small lies usually lead to big lies in toxic relationships. This is sad but true.
Please don’t ignore red flags when you are dating someone. Don’t look for excuses for someone’s bad behavior. Don’t try to justify someone’s bad attitude.
I highly encourage you to look for green flags when you are dating someone because whatever you are looking for is also looking for you.
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