Forgive Yourself and Move On. You have a purpose to fulfill and holding on to the past is just keeping you stuck.

How to stop dwelling on the past and begin to create a better life on a brighter path.

“Cry. Forgive. Learn. Move on. Let your tears water the seeds of your future happiness.” - Steve Maraboli

You read much about how to forgive yourself and move on from the past. However, it’s more important to know how to do it. Most people will eventually come to grips with why they should do it. They get stuck on actually taking steps to make it happen.

Give yourself permission to let go of the past. That is an important step. Your brain can latch onto something and is waiting for you to release the responsibility. By committing to this release, your brain can focus on other productive areas. That release comes in the form of telling yourself to let go.

Learn from your past experiences. There are learning nuggets contained within your past. Anything you have done or tried before is up for grabs in the University of your past. It’s up to you to recognize what those lessons are and how to use them effectively. The way to use them is to determine why they happened and how to avoid them in the future.

Consider learning meditation. When you are relaxed, you will have an easier time of purging your past. One of the best forms of relaxation is meditation. It takes several sessions to get your body and mind in tune with the techniques. Don’t expect fast solutions with this. The key is to keep doing it until you feel the effects.

Don’t hide from your past. People try to pretend certain aspects of their past did not happen, especially the more embarrassing moments. However, this may cause them to come back to you with a vengeance since they are bottling up within you. Acknowledge everything about your past but commit to pushing forward.

Keep a journal of your experiences. Be as detailed as possible so you can refer to the journal when faced with similar circumstances in the future. Don’t treat your journal as a bible, however. Just use the journal as a guideline.

Don’t expect all changes to occur immediately. Your past habits may be difficult to break. Therefore, don’t try to change everything in one shot. Give it time. It took a long time to develop those bad habits.

If you are too hard on yourself about your past, stop. It’s okay to acknowledge that you made some mistakes but don’t get overly critical of them.

Concentrate on the good aspects of your past. Sometimes, you may focus on your mistakes and mask the fact that you had some wonderful experiences in the past as well. These are equally important.

5 Questions You Need to Ask Yourself to Clarify Your Strategic Thinking

“Sometimes the hardest part isn't letting go but rather learning to start over.” - Nicole Sobon

Are you feeling a bit confused by strategic thinking? You know it’s essential for your career and your business, but how do you actually do it?

Here are five questions to should ask yourself to really sharpen your strategic thinking.

What do you want?

The most important thing to work out is where you want to be. Everything—goals, strategies, steps, should all be pointing to your desired destination. Do you want to be CEO, or be running your own company?

What do you want to achieve this year, in five years, ten? What are your actual goals? What’s your vision? Get it all down on paper and think big!

Where are You Starting From?

Do a survey of exactly where you are right now. What skills, resources, and assets do you have? What are your strengths, weaknesses, opportunities, and risks in your current job or business?

Are you satisfied with life the way it is, or do you want something more? What connections do you have? Map out your network and what value you provide to them, and what they offer you. Write up your self-inventory.

What do You Have the Power to Change?

Think about what is in your control at the present moment. What can you streamline or eliminate? What do you need to add, enhance, or modify to reach your goals? This can include anything from training, networking opportunities, to investment advice or strategic career planning.

What do You Need to Move Ahead?

Take another look at your self-inventory. What skills, resources, knowledge, and connections do you need to get closer to success? If this is difficult or overwhelming, consider finding a mentor or life coach who can help you find your way.

How Can I Reach My Goals and Still Enjoy Life?

Really going for success shouldn’t make for a joyless life, totally focused on getting ahead. Make sure you take time to have fun and do the things that give you pleasure. Think of what Future Successful You enjoys doing. What makes your future worth striving for?

Write down all the fun things you will do, whether it’s staying in 5-star hotels or being able to work for only half the year. Imagine driving your dream car. See yourself in your future executive suite.

See what elements of your future life you can start to incorporate in the present and build on those. Before you know it, you will be toasting your success!

Knowing What You Want Out of Life

It’s difficult to set goals when you are not even sure what you want out of life. There are plenty of people who flounder around and wing it. For some of those people, that could work. They love the spontaneity and are usually categorized as free-spirited. For the others, however, they would like a bigger purpose in their lives but aren’t quite sure what it may be.

To determine what you want, dig deep within yourself. What is it that you dream about all the time? What kinds of successful people do you read about? Do you want similar success to those people or would you like to model different characteristics of multiple people? You can also ask your friends and family how they see you, i.e., what type of person they think you are. Then you can determine whether you like that person or if you would like to try and change.

After you find some kind of defining purpose, you are not locked in. You are free to change anytime you believe it wasn’t what you thought it would be. There is nothing to stop you from having multiple purposes either. If you are a doctor, perhaps you want to become a professional golfer as well.

It’s not just about what kind of career you have. You may define a purpose that includes helping others out in a way that is not at all related to your job. You could find organizations that need volunteers and sign up to help. This often leads people to branch out into areas of their lives they never imagined they would experience. It also sets you up to meet people you otherwise would not. You will see different experiences and viewpoints that can help you with your purpose.

It’s not easy for people to determine their purpose and it’s not something that will happen after an afternoon of soul-searching. It can take a lot of time and it often requires going outside of your comfort zone to have a better realization of purpose. Sometimes it can be within our reach but we don’t come to realization until a life-changing event occurs. It is something that evolves which is what makes it scary and exciting at the same time. Once we have a good feeling for what we want our purpose to be we can then proceed to map out goals as to how to achieve it.

Adjust Your Sails to the Future

“When you can’t change the direction of the wind – adjust your sails,” is a quote from inspirational writer, H. Jackson Brown, Jr, is one that has depth and meaning if there are things going on in your life that you can’t control.

The only things you can change are those which you have control over. Therefore, you need to find a way to get on with your life (adjust your sails) and look to the future rather than spending more time on what’s not working.

If a sailor knows a storm is coming from a certain direction, he or she will adjust the sails and let the wind blow them in the opposite direction. Remaining on the same course might mean being caught up in a disaster that could sink the boat.

It’s the same with your life. Continuing on a course where disaster is looming and just waiting to take you down might make it impossible for you to ever get out of the “storm,” and head on to safe passage.

It may be difficult to change a course that you’ve been on for a long time. That route is familiar and even though filled with turmoil, it can be strangely comfortable.

Taking an unknown course of action may be scary, but necessary if you’re to get on with your life and take action to make changes that will bring you success and happiness.

The first thing you must do to rid yourself of fear for the uncharted course is to stop worrying. Practice replacing negative thoughts with positive ones and soon it will become automatic.

Mentally prepare yourself by gathering knowledge about your new course of action, visualizing yourself in your new role in the future. You may still run into situations you’re unprepared for – and you may make some wrong decisions on the path – but, perseverance will get you through the dark and stormy times and guide you to safety.

Next, remove the negative elements from your life. It may be difficult, because some of the negative elements might be friends, family and others, but it’s a necessary action that must happen before you can get through the present storm in your life.

Set goals, take action on them and stay the course. You’ll soon realize your dreams and desires for the future.

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  • National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 (SAFE)
  • National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255


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