Crab bucket mentality is alive and well, but you can't be held down unless you allow yourself to be.

Definition: Crab Bucket Mentality is a toxic mindset held by a person who makes it their personal mission to pull another person down (sabotage) because it looks like that person is coming up (succeeding).

“The only person who can pull me down is myself, and I'm not going to let myself pull me down anymore.”
― C. JoyBell C.

Crab bucket mentality people come in all shapes and sizes- races and ethnicities.

The most important thing for us to learn how to do is release people, places, and things that don’t support us. That seems like an obvious thing to do, but you would be surprised how many of us hold on to relationships; jobs; and habits that pull us down.

What is crab bucket mentality?:  Pulling people down when you see they are trying to come up. It’s utter madness. Why don’t the other crabs mind their own business and do the work to climb out of the bucket themselves.

I know they are crabs not people, but the visual offers an example of how toxic people try to pull others down.

What’s more, we fall into the trap of believing that those things outside of ourselves can hold us down, when truthfully, the only person, place, or thing that can hold us down is us.

“The unhappiest people in this world, are those who care the most about what other people think.”
― C. JoyBell C.

Why do crab bucket mentality people try to hold you back?
•    What they want hasn’t manifested
•    They are toxic, plain and simple
•    They are too lazy to come up with their own plan and do the work
•    They’ve been betrayed so now they want to return the favor to you
•    You are a rising star and they know it.
•    Misery loves company.
•    They are jealous.

“Life is too short to waste any amount of time on wondering what other people think about you. In the first place, if they had better things going on in their lives, they wouldn't have the time to sit around and talk about you. What's important to me is not others' opinions of me, but what's important to me is my opinion of myself.”
― C. JoyBell C

How Do Crab Bucket Mentality People Hold You Back?

•    They try to sabotage
•    They try to discourage your dreams: They learn who you are and what you believe and then discourage you. They gain your trust and then give you poor advice--sabotage.

•    They try to manipulate you
•    When you need their help the are nowhere to be found
•    Try to throw you off balance by doing something like inviting you out for drinks the night before you have your bar exam.
•    Sink your confidence to move forward.

“I have come to realize that no one can do a better job of hindering my progress than me.  –Lynn R. Davis”

Misery loves company and will try to sabotage you, but can only succeed if we allow them to. Even if their weapon forms, it won’t prosper.

This is not a rose colored glasses article.So let me acknowledge a few things:
•    Struggles are real.
•    Battles are lost.
•    Hardships happen.
•    Pain is real and it hurts like hell.

“You will find that it is necessary to let things go; simply for the reason that they are heavy. So let them go, let go of them. I tie no weights to my ankles.”
― C. JoyBell C

Focus on what to do next. What do you do after the battle is lost? What is the solution to the struggle? How can the pain be lessened; managed; or eradicated all together?
Let go of the fears, battles, hardships, pain. Give it to God. Focus on the solution. Solutions salve wounds and promote healing.


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NATIONAL HOTLINES

  • National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 (SAFE)
  • National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255

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